Sunday, July 20, 2008

The week in review

My brother has come from Ireland but goes home today. We've had a wonderful visit considering. Becky spent the night with Mom, Steven the night before. This allowed me to spend a couple of nights in a real bed. Although my last two nights in the hospital were spent on a cot, compared to the chair I sat in two nights in a row, the cot was heaven. Yesterday they transfered Mom (yet again this makes the 6th room she has been in since entering the hospital) to the cancer ward. We're not sure if she knows she has cancer, she's been told, but she's not all that with it. All the England's have been and gone. They have been rocks and really wonderful support, this is the only "family" we have in this country. It's hard to have everyone together and not have a party so when not actually in Mom's room we've been trying to have a good time. We are planning to get together at New Years, as in year's past. Mom has way less tubes and sat up and then stood yesterday. The infection is still with her, she will be having a procedure to try and remove it sometime soon. She is so much more aware during the day, but at night delirium sets in she is more uncomfortable and disoriented. This is normal, which is why I stress to you again don't leave a loved one in the hospital alone at night, bad things happen to them.
My Dad is sad, as we all are. I've been doing pretty well, but for a brief moment when Becky tried to show me a card Mom gave her sometime back, just seeing her writing on the envelope sent me into floods of tears.
I buy food but I don't cook. I'm going through the motions of having a normal life but then I do something like buy enough groceries for an army that sit in the fridge because I neither have the time or energy to cook them. I have knitting that is unfinished, slightly gone wrong (OK so the fingerless gloves in Camel and Silk went fine until I started knitting the hand part. the size 8 needles were fine for the cuff. The straight stockinette looks OK until I made the thumb hole. It's far too big and loose, so I have the thought that the size 6 needles might be better, but I haven't tried because I wonder if I need to buy size 7's instead, and that's where the project sits) knitting, but have no incentive to finish. My wheel still sits in the closet, and while I long for it, getting it out and actually spinning seems too much work. Although now Mom has been moved to the most fantastic and largest room ever I will take it tonight, and spin. I have escaped into Roman Briton several times with my book "Hadrian's Wall" by William Detrick. I love it but only get to read a few pages some nights. One section I've read several times, since I forget my place and forget I've read the pages or looked at the pages without really "reading" them
In the course of a week my computer has decided it doesn't feel well either and expensive valent efforts are being undertaken to repair it. I am glad to have my new phone (which receives and sends e-mails thanks for all the good wishes-!! It's wonderful to read them in the middle of the night when I feel alone and lost) and Mike's computer but all my passwords and e-mail accounts are on that computer, so if you need to "talk" to me the best way is to e-mail me and I can return your e-mail through the phone. It's hard to talk on the phone as I'm either trying to sleep at home or in the hospital. I'm so used to whispering (yes I CAN whisper) that the normal sounds of home sound incredibly loud, and "normal" people have asked me to speak up~ they really have!
Mike continues to be a rock, and support team. I have moments of insane idea's and he has gently guided my path back onto the road of good thinking. My body is so sore, sitting all day it's not use to. I try and use stairs and go for walks but always feel the pull of the hospital.....
We also have a problem in the garden, the neighbors planted a good looking plant that is fruiting in our garden, having grown through the many cracks in our enjoining wall. When I looked it up on the web thinking it might be edible, we found it is a terribly invasive plant (Creeping Fig) who's fruit is poisonous. It's leaves are also poisonous, some people have terrible allergic reactions to it's sap. The tendril's can get as large as 1/2" in diameter, but cutting it gums up your saw and clippers making it impossible to trim it. It seems Round-Up and other toxic plant poisons don't work and digging them up only makes them come back stronger. One person warns not to plant it near your house as it can cover it in a year, and they dislove wood, and crumble bricks..... Oh my it's halfway down our wall......another problem. Cyrus (our rescue cat) has some sort of nasty abscess, which needs a vet visit. Yikes....normal life seems overwhelming.
The "Grey" (our African Grey parrot Scarlet) has learned "House Finch" and tries to talk to the many House Finches that eat her food, she must be lonely. Our Hoya is blooming again! I get to see this bloom, however my camera is up in St. Helens, so even though I have high speed I can't show you how pretty it looks. Our Roses are all doing well, but we are getting all new window's and doors installed this week and the roses that are near the house need to be pruned down below the window level some distance. They are all doing so well this is going to be quite the job and a little sad as there are so many blooms. Our new roses are all blooming too. Mike has done a really great job of keeping up the back yard. A pair of Black Phoebes' were feeding in the back yard the other day. Their darting about catching bugs is very acrobatic. I have to get going and eat breakfast before I take Becky back to the hospital to join the shuttle from the hospital to the airport (ala Fowler/Andersen shuttle). I feel better for a long continues sleep last night and sort of dread going back tonight, even though I'm glad to be there for my Mom. Keep those e-mails coming and the prayers and/or well wishes going they mean so much thanks!


Laura said...


You and your family are constantly on my mind. Having lived through this, I can tell you that everything you are experiencing is completely normal.

Continue to make time for yourself, even as you are available for Mom, as you will need your strength to face this ongoing challenge.

And keep up the good work with her too. The one thing I can say about my Father is that I have absolutely no regrets where he is concerned.



Dz said...

We're still loving on you guys and praying for you all from Minnesota!

Anonymous said...


Nancy & I are keeping you and the family in our thoughts and prayers. If you need us to do anything up this way let us know.
George & Nancy

Romi said...

Hang in there! I'm thinking of you....

janel said...

Oh Trish, I am sending a big giant hug full of nourishing love to help you through this hard time. I keep you and your mom and your family in my thoughts and prayers and I know that you are doing the best thing possible for your mom, which is to be there sending her your love.